Jobs

Alright so I really need to get off my behind and get one. I've put it off long enough, and as nice as it is being able to stay at home, I feel like I'm not making a contribution to our household. I feel indebted to B because he pays for everything. At this point in our relationship I don't want to have to rely on him for everything. It makes me feel bad about myself and makes me feel guilty when I want to spend money on something like new clothes. I definitely need my own money, I think it will give me some freedom. And I would be able to get a car because I would actually have money for a car payment.

I have to admit, I haven't put a ton of effort into looking for a job, I have done some searching, stopped into some places I was interested in, none of which was hiring by the way. So as much as I really don't want to work in retail, I think I'm going to go talk to American Eagle about transferring. I mean, it will pay the bills, and the job isn't so bad sometimes, and I'm bound to meet some cool people(hopefully). I lived on my own for two years, paying rent and paying bills, granted my parents did help me out, but for the most part I supported myself.

This whole me beind dependent on B has kind of put a strain on our relationship, and I don't want that. So hello employment! We definitely have some logistics to figure out with only one car right now, especially since B's mom is flying in in a week, but I hope to be employed in the next few weeks!

Working at AE again will be difficult, because I do have a terrible shopping addiction, but I'm hoping to curb that. I just have to stay strong, and put money into a savings account so its not sitting in my checking account taunting me.

Cooking

Cooking has become a lot more fun for me since moving in with B. I've always enjoyed trying new recipes and playing around with them, but cooking for one is just not really fun. There's just something about cooking a big delicious meal for others that gets me, I guess I like the satisfaction of others enjoying something delicious I made. I've been having lots of fun trying out new recipes, and thankfully B doesn't mind either. Some of them have been delicious and some not as much. But I am really excited for dinner tonight. I'm making steak marianated in a Spicy Southwest rub with cheesy bacon mashed potatoes and green beans with almonds. yummmmm :)

Happy Birthday To Me!

Well another year down, I'm officially 22 now! Is it just me or do the years just keep going faster and faster?? It seems like just yesterday I was celebrating my 21st Birthday, and here I am a year later.

I pretty much got the best birthday present ever this year. I was reliving all my 8 year old fantasies, about opening up a present and having a puppy jump out of a box. Not that it happened this way at all. I went to a shelter and picked out a dog and brought him home, but still. Said present is currently curled up next to me snoring. He is just way too cute.

Yesterday we had to take him to the vet to get checked out, because I suspected that his incision from being neutered was infected, and unfortunately I was correct. He also has a little kennel cough from being in a shelter, poor guy. We got him set up with some antibiotics and doggy morphine though so hopefully he'll be feeling better in the next couple of days. I caved last night though and brought him into bed to sleep. He's been really good ever since we got him about sleeping in a crate, he's actually seemed to like it, but last night after I put him in he started wimpering and all I could think about was if he was scared and in pain so I let him out and brough him up into bed and of course the little stinker slept like a baby all curled up in the comforter. It's just too hard to say no to those baby eyes.

I really haven't felt like doing anything around the house today. I think I grew up spoiled, having a summer birthday, I never had school on my birthday and ever since I've had a job I've made sure to take that day off so I could do something fun, so I never want to do any kind of work on my birthday. Maybe it's a little selfish, I don't really care, this is one day that is all about me :) I will eventually get some stuff done, I'm just going to take my sweet time doing it.

Later we're going out to dinner at this awesome Japanese steakhouse down in Olympia. I also hinted to Brandan that an ice cream cake from Baskin Robins would be delightful :) Hopefully he comes through!

I feel so loved from all the birthday wishes I've gotten today. Thank you to everybody who has wished me a happy birthday! You all have succeeded in making my birthday amazing already and it's still only the morning!

Introducing Sulley!

Meet Sulley! He's some kind of Chihuahua terrier mix and he's just a year old and so adorable! I am in love with him! Hands down, best birthday present ever, thanks to my love, B <3 He's super shy and is still getting used to us and our home, but I think he's gonna like it here =D

Dogs!

Well we visited a couple of animal shelters today and saw some really adorable dogs. I wanted to take them all home with me!! I wish I had a huge acreage so I could adopt the all and have them all live with me. I would be like a cat lady only with dogs haha. Anyway we decided not to make any decisions today because theres another shelter we want to check out tomorrow that has a lot more dogs. A lot of the dogs we saw today were on the medium to large side and we would both really rather stick to a smaller one. Hopefully tomorrow we will find a dog and bring it home with us!

Right now I'm cooking dinner. I'm making fried rice and teriyaki beef with sauteed vegetables and garlic bread. It is smelling quite delicious! I better get off the internet and get back to cooking before I burn the house down!

Babies and Puppies!

A close friend of mine had her baby early this morning! I'm so so excited for her, and the baby is so precious! I just wish I could be back in Minnesota to meet her little one, but hopefully over Thanksgiving we'll be able to get together and catch up and I can meet little Adalyn.

More exciting news, last night B and I were just sitting around watching a movie when he turns to me and tells me that we can get a dog if I want. What??! Of course I want! I've been wanting a dog for SOOOO long! I grew up with them and I miss having somebody to greet me when I come home and somebody to snuggle with when I'm sitting on the couch (when B isn't around of course). When we first moved here he said he didn't want a pet because he didn't want to have to pay extra. I'm not sure what brought him around but I am so incredibly excited!! After he gets off work today we're going over to the shelter to see if we can find a dog to bring home. I'm sure we won't have any problems finding one, it'll be picking one out that's tough. I'm going to want to take them all home with me! I'm a sucker for dogs.

He mentioned something about a cat too, but I'm just not much of a cat person. Never really have been. My dad is allergic, so we never had one growing up. I just loves dogs because they're so friendly and loving. You can see the love in their little eyes when they look at you. Since I've been out here I've been missing my parents dogs so much. I saw them a lot before I moved and was really attached to them.

I think today will be a grand day :)

Just One Of Those Days

Ever have one of those days where you feel like you can't do anything right? Thats been my week so far. I just can't shake this mood and I don't know why. Ugh.. I hope things look up soon...

Tragedy

Yesterday something awful happened, my cousin was killed in a gun accident. They think it was an accident, he was playing with his gun, shooting birds and he accidentally shot himself. He was only 14 or 15, I'm not really sure, it's been a long while since I've seen him. It's just so sad though. How does something like this happen? I mean he was so young, had his whole life ahead of him. How does something so awful like this happen? I just don't understand.

My uncle was the one who found him, and I just can't get the image out of my head. I can't stop thinking about what he must have felt, finding him. It was his stepson, but he loved him like it was his own. I can't imagine dealing with that everyday, I didn't even see it and I can't get the image out of my head. I feel so awful for my aunt and uncle. My heart aches for them. What a terrible thing, to lose a child. A parent should NEVER have to bury their child. It's just so wrong.

I feel so helpless being so far away too. My family has been through some rough shit, but we've always been there for each other. Now I'm 1,700 miles away from all of them and I feel helpless. My mom told me not to come home, that my uncle will understand, but I still feel as though I should.

I still can't wrap my head around this. I'm sure it will take awhile, these things usually do.